Changing My Perspective

I am usually a really, really positive person.

I’ve been told my super power is to find a silver lining in any dark cloud. It is true that I can find a positive spin for absolutely anything, but every once  in a while I give in to circumstances and allow myself to feel crappy. It’s partly laziness,  sometimes feeling hard done by because things didn’t go exactly as I expected them to and sometimes it’s just me being too dang hard on myself.

Once I start the negative self talk “This is stupid… This is unfair… I’m gonna get sick… I’m gonna get fat after eating all that….”,  I create that reality for myself. Whatever I’m saying is exactly what happens. It spirals, becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy and leads to more and more negativity.

Fortunately for me, these moods never last long. A day or two max. Unfortunately for me, I realize the whole time that I am choosing my narrative, and that the negativity is simply indulgence. That adds some extra guilt to the whole package ’cause I know all it would take to pull myself up and out of the hole is a change in my perspective.

It takes some practice, but we are able to control our thoughts, which in turn control our emotions, bodies, actions and even our deeds.  Seriously, there is something to this whole ‘positive thinking’ thing people go on about. It also works in the other direction. Your actions and bodies can change your emotions and thoughts as well. For example, if you fake smile  or laugh when you are feeling down  you will actually start to feel better. There is a biofeedback between your body and brain that works almost like magic.

This is the main idea behind the science of Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP), which literally means programing your neural pathways with your words.  People have been using words, mantras,  affirmations, incantations and all other manner of words with focused intention behind them, to change or create a certain feeling, emotion or reality for a millenia. There is actually a science behind it. NLP explains the physiological process involved and some amazing quantum physics (outside the scope of this post) explain the how.

But regardless of how it works, I do know affirmations change our thought patterns and in turn create our reality.

My affirmations for this week are:

I am healthy, happy and whole.

I am peaceful and joyful in every moment.

I am unfazed by the little irritations that life brings.

I bring joy, light and love to every situation I encounter.

I am patient.

I practice loving kindness and compassion with myself and all others beings I encounter.

I am love.

What affirmations will change your perspective today?

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4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. GMNightmare
    Dec 20, 2010 @ 10:50:08

    “Whatever I’m saying is exactly what happens. It spirals, becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy and leads to more and more negativity.”

    Does it really?

    “Fortunately for me, these moods never last long. A day or two max.”

    Oh, I guess not then. Everything that your saying is complete bull for just that reason… you can’t be honest with yourself. You ignore your negative emotions. Instead of challenging them, you push them aside and never analyze and correct the source of why they are there in the first place.

    Let me put it to you this way, instead of going, “Well, I’m upset about this bit of situation/me so I’ll fix it.”, you are instead going, “I’m upset about this situation/me, but instead of fixing it, I’ll just be happy instead.” This actually ends up being self-destructive… have you started pushing others away yet in attempts to purge all negativity from your life? Moved on to purging all dissenting opinions? Never listen to anybody because you have it all figured out?

    Listen carefully, what you are saying only resorts to blaming the victim. You berated yourself for feeling negative emotions, even though your emotions were a reaction to stimulus. Really, how did you get from the proper title of “changing your perspective” to “changing reality”? No amount of positive thinking or negative thinking will change anybodies reality, it will only change perspective of it, and it’s just that simple. Reality has nothing to do with your feelings of it. It really doesn’t. You may try to change how you perceive reality all you want, but reality will never change because of that… that’s why it’s called reality.

    So if you get sick this week it’s your fault for not thinking you’re healthy enough? I honestly don’t understand arguments like yours. Read your paper from the standpoint of somebody who doesn’t already agree with you. Statements like “I am love”… where is that coming from? Why do you think your just a emotion? Where is even the evidence of such? You said it because it sounded nice. It sounded fluffy. It gratified your ego. But it was a completely nonsensical statement.

    And you need to understand something right now. “NLP” is not science. Nor is it even scientific. It has absolutely no basis in science what-so-ever. There is no science behind it. The is no evidence for it. There is no empirical research for it. There is nothing that supports it. Science and “NLP” do not belong next to each other. Just because you hear about it, and it sounds nice, doesn’t make it automatically true. Which is the problem we just had above, all it does is gratify the ego.

    Quit trying to gratify your ego and fix it instead. Instead of masking your actual emotions and ignoring them, solve why they’re there in the first place. That’s what actual science points to why we have negative emotions in the first place.

    Let me explain it to you in a way that should make it obvious to you… you attract what matches your energy right?

    By ignoring your negative emotions, what do you think is happening energetically?

    In conclusion…

    Believing that positive thinking is the solution to problems instead of just helping them, is just another form of blaming the victim. And you need to understand and acknowledge your emotions, including the negative ones.

    Reply

    • bringingyouohm
      Dec 27, 2010 @ 03:53:48

      Thanks for your comment. You’re completely right. I realize now that I was missing a vital part of the healing process in my post. I do realize the importance of acknowledging and dealing with emotions, before you can start reframing things, otherwise, they will just come and keep biting you in the ass. This is a pretty new thing for me. It’s only in the last 3 years that I’ve started to deal with all the things I didn’t from my past. It’s a learning process for sure. I try not to lie to myself but completely acknowledging my emotions is new to me and I’m still working on doing it all the time.
      Here is a post I just wrote with more about that: https://bringingyouohm.wordpress.com/2010/12/27/reframing-christmas/

      I appreciate your comment, and definitely will try to keep your words in mind when I post. I do think that some of the NLP practices do work, at least for me, but you do need that first step of dealing with your emotions before reframing it. I do believe in affirmations as well. They help me a lot, but it’s not about ignoring your emotions, it’s just a way of helping you fix them, in conjunction with other things.

      With respect to the statement, I am love. It isn’t about saying I am an emotion. To me, love is the way. It is the way to peace, and the way to more love. My goal is to live with loving kindness and compassion. I dream of a world where we all do. Having compassion for others as well as yourself allows you to feel deeply, any feeling you have, and allows you to understand the feelings of others, which guide their actions. It allows for forgiveness and it leads to more love. The love I’m talking about isn’t romantic love though. It’s divine love. The love of the Goddess, mother love, infinite love. It’s beyond ego, but it definitely is gratifying. It also may be fluffy, but it is also the most substantial thing there is.
      Love and peace to you, and thank you again for your words, helping me grow, heal and learn.

      Reply

  2. sid
    Jan 01, 2011 @ 05:52:18

    Let it go, let it roll right off your shoulder,
    Don’t you know, the hardest part is over, let it in,

    Reply

  3. mg
    Jan 03, 2011 @ 17:59:05

    Nice blog, good articles, I really like this post. keep it up!
    what u think u become..

    Reply

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